I got another INNER BITCH page-a-day desk calendar this year. It wasn’t my first choice, but I do run across some quotes that really click and this is one of them:
“The first step in getting over Toxic Niceness is to start caring less about what other people think and care more about what you think.”
Respect is what you get when you live authentically, i.e. walk your talk. Don’t agree to do thinks you don’t want to or that compromise your own feelings, ideas and beliefs. Truly participate in the things you do. This is, of course, easier said than done. My own retirement plans are a case in point. I know that it will be a solo (or perhaps a mother-daughter) retirement, but I haven’t told my current partner. He has demoted himself from significant other to roommate. I don’t want the drama and conflict that making that clear to him would entail, but I know.